Exhausted

I've been tired for so many years. The gouge of daily life seems to only deepen.
My body, a physical manifestation of pain.
My mind, misunderstood or too complicated for the masses.
It is both poison and wine.

The poison keeps dissipating any semblance of happiness, while the wine both encourages and conceals.
A roundabout that hasn't any exits.
A darkness that hasn't any light.
It just keeps weighting down like a sinker.

The tired fog envelopes like a tarnished cloud.
No amount of polishing could bring about the shine.
It sits there heavy, like solid silver.
Never worth its weight in gold.

You scream for help, plead for someone to feel what you feel.
In silence.
Because your real voice is never heard.
Everyone always hears what they want.

The knot in your chest ebbs and flows like the tide.
It is always there, but sometimes you can forget it and smile.
I wish it were opposite.
Where my smile is always there, but sometimes I feel the knot.

Being alone, but not wanting to be near.
Wanting to be wanted, yet unable to give anymore.
It is all so cumbersome. A strain on my very soul.
Outside the depiction is physical. Inside I'm...well,

Exhausted.